File: It's Not That Bad I'm Just Awful.swf-(3.78 MB, 500x570, Loop)
[_] Anonymous 11/15/22(Tue)20:08:01 No.3489664
Question for degens, did you ever get better. If so, how?
Anyway enjoy another one fresh out of the oven.
>> [_] Anonymous 11/15/22(Tue)23:04:35 No.3489667
Not really
I'm just pretty much emotionally and dead and my dopamine receptors are so fried I can barely
feel sexual arousal anymore
>> [_] Anonymous 11/16/22(Wed)15:48:21 No.3489684
I am getting better. It takes an understanding of why we do what we do and seeing the
consequences and down fall of it all. Drinking and jerking off waste energy and achieve nothing
for me. So I look into why I do it and fight back.
What anime?
>> [_] Anonymous 11/16/22(Wed)22:19:18 No.3489694
>>3489684
tanaka-kun is always listless
>> [_] Anonymous 11/17/22(Thu)00:43:44 No.3489698
This
>> [_] Anonymous 11/17/22(Thu)00:45:11 No.3489699
>>3489664
Thanks for this, anon.
I don't drink (I seriously don't think I ever will), but I do smoke weed and oh god you don't
wanna know the kind of porn I was once very into
Really, it was a downward spiral into more depraved and soul-destroying porn, wasting away
meanwhile, until I did a round of nootropics (notably, two weeks of daily combined cerebrolysin
and cortexin injections), followed by LSD, and eventually psilocybin microdoses in three-day
intervals. A year into the microdosing, I started using weed. I was 23 when I injected the
nootropics, and ever since that time, I started genuinely looking up. Not a lot at first.
It was very slow to start—but I was always trying.
(i also had mercury poisoning, and used a chelator called emeramide to treat that—that stuff is
really uniquely life-saving, if the time comes where you need a heavy metal chelator that doesn't
both destroy your body and take forever to work)
Aside from everything, I think I was just really, really, really depressed. It took me a long
time to let go of the past. There's a lot of obvious stuff in my life I could lament on—it's
especially fortunate that weed's really helpful when it comes to allowing other things to grab,
and keep my attention.
Compared to a year ago, I have a great job. I have a driver's license, and a car I can drive. I
have ample personal space. There's miles between me and any of my family members, except for my
sister (one of the few strong enough to be worth caring about).
I don't have as much money as I did a year or even two years ago (started trading crypto in
2017), but I have more than just reason to be optimistic—I have sheer determination to do the
right thing, and patience to do it.
I have a plan. And it's a very good one. (Assuming I can learn how to follow any of it.)
(I still degen, all the time. it doesn't consume me. perhaps, some day, it won't be my go-to
hobby. that, or i'll find a way to turn it into a weapon against lethargy. i'll make it healthy.)
>> [_] Anonymous 11/17/22(Thu)02:57:26 No.3489700
Define "better". Getting more into what normies considers "degenerate"?
>> [_] Anonymous 11/17/22(Thu)04:13:23 No.3489703
Ty everyone for appreciating my flash. It's rare that any of the shit I bake does numbers at all.
>>3489699
I really liked your story, it kinda gives me a bit of hope I suppose.
>>3489700
Idk, my version of degeneracy is really just being an awful awful person overall. It seems like
everything I enjoy is wrong and everything I do is wrong.
>> [_] Anonymous 11/17/22(Thu)08:29:17 No.3489705
>>3489703
Being an awful person how? Its all about perspective man. Do you enjoy hurting people or some
shit like that? Or do you just enjoy things other people find strange. Smoking weed and jacking
off to weird porn isn't hurtin anyone else there's no need to feel bad about it. Find what makes
you happy and enjoy it for what little time we have
Unless you're a furry. Then you should yiff in hell
>> [_] Anonymous 11/17/22(Thu)09:07:17 No.3489708
I've managed to backpedal out of some of the shit I used to like or think but ultimately I just
slowed the downward spiral. It's going clockwise instead of counterclockwise now, and I'm not
going to hit the ground as fast or as hard, but it's going down and I still haven't figured out
how to pull out of the spin.
I had a big paragraph written here I've decided is retarded. This has been a good reminder that I
was supposed to look for a therapist this week. I should get to that.
I will say that if you partake in more and more degenerate things, and you recognize them as
degenerate, you should really ween yourself off of it and try to find less degen
activities/hobbies until you get out completely. If you're a coomer, then for porn, I just
started cutting entire topics out of the picture. If you struggle to fap at first, that's fine.
Eventually you will naturally be able to get the job done on the lightest of material the more
days pass. The more you fap to a certain kind of thing, the more you'll come to enjoy it, like a
reverse system. I've never done drugs (not even weed) so I have no frame of reference for that
problem. I do have a mild alcohol problem but for the past few weeks I haven't been able to bring
myself to drink despite wanting to. Not sure why that is.
If you're a furry or are in a group that does illegal things or generally seeks the pain of true
innocents (animals, children) then you should start getting quiet in those groups for awhile
until you can slip away unnoticed.
>> [_] Anonymous 11/17/22(Thu)09:33:28 No.3489709
no it never gets better im just waiting for something to kill me
>> [_] Anonymous 11/17/22(Thu)13:13:51 No.3489712
My life is theoretically the best it's ever been overall. Yet I'm not happy. That's life. I've
made such progress from where I was 10 years ago, and I really don't know how I would even live
if I was still in that position. I am grateful for where I am, but that doesn't make me happy, or
even satiate me. To be human is to want. No matter how far you get, you'll still want.
>> [_] Anonymous 11/17/22(Thu)13:26:15 No.3489713
yes, because I'm starting to understand that it never goes away and it's a part of me now.
