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[_] Your Future President Anon 1801081 I spent a large chunk of my life in an area dominated by Mormons (95% of the population, where 95.2% of the population is white), and having observed Romney, I can assure you that the US is going to be good and fucked for the next four years. Good night and good luck. Marked for deletion (old).
>> [_] Anon 1801092 hmmm Mormon or islamic.... both those roads lead to the slaughter. There's a 3rd choice that neither of the left or right leg wanted to argue with.
>> [_] Japanese Bird Cooking Spaghetti !.kY34XtGRg 1801095 YOU CAN'T TOUCH MORMON JESUS
>> [_] Anon 1801096 >Shit his blood for us
>> [_] Anon 1801108 >Don'ts >Liquor >Tobacco >Pornography >Coca-Cola? >? Well is it or isn't it? Why the question mark?
>> [_] Anon 1801109 wow. I have a lot more respect for Mormonism now, I may look into it.
>> [_] Anon 1801111 >># Caffeinated beverages are a toss-up issue. Those with a literal standpoint argue that the Word of Wisdom doesn't specifically list it so it's okay, while others argue that soda falls into the spirit of the edict.
>> [_] Anon 1801114 >># What about stuff like cannabis, cocaine and lsd?
>> [_] Anon 1801115 >># Mormons refer to the body as a temple, so anything that causes self-harm is considered to be bad.
>> [_] Anon 1801199 >># So weed is okay then?
>> [_] Anon 1801204 >># >Long damage
>> [_] Anon 1801205 >># *lung. Shit, it's late.
>> [_] Anon 1801309 Name one policy that Romney is pushing that's directly related and exclusive to his Mormon beliefs.
>> [_] Anon 1801328 A great explanation for a religion almost as crazy as Scientology.
>> [_] Anon 1801329 Also Magic Mormon Underwear lol
>> [_] Anon 1801331 >># Also orange juice too much of that stuff can kill ya you know.
>> [_] Anon 1801388 some of this is absolute crap by some I mean most, its almost funny (having had been lds a large portion of my life)

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[_] This is why... Anon 1789685 ...the world ends at the end of 2012. Marked for deletion (old).
>> [_] Anon 1789703 Can't drink Caffeine, well fuck. Can't masturbate, SHIT looks like I won't become a god.
>> [_] Anon 1789715 >># You also need to know the four secret handshakes ("Tokens") to give Elohim at the Veil.
>> [_] Anon 1789717 >># Also, Pepsi is fine because the church owns stock in it.
>> [_] Anon 1789861 funny how most of this is comeplete BS. It is so lulzy how Mormons get hated so much in a country of supposed "free religion", did you know that the mormon haters convinced the govs at one point that the mormons were anti-US and thus the gov sent the army to get 'em?
>> [_] Anon 1789906 >># Yes, it is complete BS. Religion is like that.
>> [_] Anon 1789907 >># That's because the church was anti-government. Part of the sacred temple ceremony involved a vow to get revenge for the death of Joseph Smith, before eventually being redacted. The reason Mormons are hated because they can't keep their religion to themselves, e.g. maintaining an army of missionaries and pushing anti-gay and anti-abortion bills.
>> [_] Anon 1789909 Mormons, the most secretive church, who send people out door to door to tell you about it.

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[_] Endless Celestial Sex Anon 1775354 Marked for deletion (old).
>> [_] Mr. Kidnapper 1775370 Glad to see someone's still using my /f/ player. Although I do remember that the original OP purposely stuck 510KB's worth of 0's to the end of the file using a hex editor to make it seem less like a virus.
>> [_] Anon 1775396 Is this shit True? someone thats Moron Please Let me know.
>> [_] Anon 1775402 Not Mormon, but I grew up around them. This video does exaggerate and make a few things up, but most of it reflects official doctrine or personal beliefs held by groups within it. Notably, the parts about the origin of blacks, Jesus being in America, and the spirit child - mortal - god cycle are official teachings of the church. Not mentioned: they believe the Garden of Eden was in Missouri.
>> [_] Anon 1775417 >this video >my sides >meme arrows
>> [_] Anon 1775425 >Magic Mormon Underwear Seems legit
>> [_] Anon 1775445 Where can one buy this magical mormon underwear?
>> [_] Anon 1775464 >># store.lds.org/webapp/wcs/stores/servlet/ Category3_715839595_10557_21152_-1_Y_imag e_0
>> [_] Anon 1775475 Grew up Mormon, im atheist now. This is ridiculous. Sure, much of this is true, but they don't state all of the doctrine. In addition, the "facts" about Joseph Smith are opinions recorded in history. That does not make them facts. Lastly, magic underwear are called "garments" and are a symbol of modesty. If you can see them, you being modest enough. That's all they are. Just long, unflattering and ugly underwear. Shit like this makes me mad, not because I was Mormon, but because people can get away with spouting utter bull shit.
>> [_] Anon 1775533 >Alouin was taught Mormon principles while growing up ... Huh? If Alouin is mormonism's synonym for God, who's the big mind behind these "principles," then?
>> [_] Anon 1775588 >># "Elohim". And that's a good question that, as far as I'm unaware of, the church doesn't address.
>> [_] Anon 1775592 >># There are court records showing that Smith was charged with a number of scam-type crimes. The part about being Jesus's descendant and being greater than Jesus are fabrications as far as I can tell. As for Garments: "You have had a Garment placed upon you, which you were informed represents the garment given to Adam and Eve...You were informed that it will be a shield and a protection to you inasmuch as you do not defile it, and if you are true and faithful to your covenants." - 1990 Endowment Ceremony (much watered down from the older ceremonies) It's open to interpretation, but "shield and protection" suggests that it's more than a piece of clothing. There are also common rumors in congregations about people surviving car crashes that others didn't because they were wearing them.
>> [_] Anon 1775593 Magic space gods and endless celestial sex is just fine with me. At least they're not pedophile worshiping Muslims.
>> [_] noko 1775597 >># >grew up mormon >athiest now lol. y u mad? The "religeon" is 9001% retard. And yeah, most of this IS true. Mormon, drop the 4 letter. Moron, its in the name
>> [_] Anon 1775600 >># Well, the church's retarded cousin the FLDS did have Warren Jeffs, who performed marriages between middle aged men and underage girls, in a temple with a creepy ceremonial bed (google "flds bed")... It could be argued that the FLDS are more true to the church's original ideals. The modern LDS church is mostly about being Republican and owning a great deal of high value real-estate and corporate shares.

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[_] Anon 1731376 Marked for deletion (old).
>> [_] friendsofsandwiches 1731379 Legit? or open windows:print screen?
>> [_] Anon 1731385 Legit, it streams off YouTube.
>> [_] friendsofsandwiches 1731397 Holy fuck... no wonder they don't want anyone to know about their religion. I thought scientology was fucked up... At least this explains why you don't see any black mormons.
>> [_] Anon 1731398 endless celestial sex
>> [_] Anon 1731408 Oh my god, op. Thank you. I needed a laugh.
>> [_] Anon 1731466 Lol im totally bookmarking this
>> [_] Anon 1731467 mormon space opera... hahaha
>> [_] Anon 1731481 endless celestial SEX
>> [_] Anon 1731488 The problem with Endless Celestial Sex is that it comes with billions of Spirit Children.
>> [_] Anon 1731491 Mormonfag checking in- I've heard and had to explain / try to defend some pretty crazy stuff before but this stuff isn't even anywhere close to the mark o_o - I have no clue where any of this came from. Feels like trolling to me ;p
>> [_] Anon 1731496 >># Filthy Heathen
>> [_] Anon 1731499 >># must be one of those black mormons.
>> [_] Anon 1731506 >># The fact that you're on 4chan tells me you're a "Jack" Mormon. This is what Temple Mormons believe.
>> [_] Anon 1731523 >># Explanation for outsiders: Jack Mormons comprise about 80% of the church, which is mostly just basic Christianity. They believe in the doctrine but aren't active participants and/or do stuff that excludes them from holding a Temple Recommend (e.g. consuming caffeine, masturbating, not tithing 10% of their income). The other 20% are Temple Mormons -- these are the scary ones. They went on a two year mission, attended BYU, married before turning 20, have five children. These are the ones that are allowed into the temples to learn the kind of batshit teachings contained into this video. However, they're sworn to secrecy, so they'll deny all of it to outsiders. The reason that the outside world knows about this stuff is thanks to Temple Mormons who finally make it into the temple, realize how crazy this stuff is, become apostates and tell others.
>> [_] Anon 1731550 >># Which the women deal with. Not the male God. As Gods can only be male.